I saw that someone had asked this question recently, but I had no context for it. I assumed it was a woman, but I didn’t know for sure, and I didn’t know an age or any of the circumstances that would prompt someone to ask a question like this.

But I was intrigued, and kept wondering how I would answer. So here is what I would say.

The Greatest Sacrifice

To give your life for another human being is the greatest sacrifice anyone could ever make. Soldiers, police officers, firefighters and others face the possibility of giving their lives every day. Sometimes ordinary people are faced with the same challenge, for example when they confront a gun-wielding thug about to rob a companion or push a loved one out of the way of speeding car. If you have a loving relationship with someone that you would be willing to take a bullet to protect without a moment’s hesitation, then I say, yes, you have a boyfriend worth dying for. And you are fortunate indeed.

Another Source of Danger

But sometimes the danger is not from an external source, such as a criminal or a car careening out of control coming right at your loved one. Sometimes the boyfriend is the one who could kill you if you stay in that relationship. If you are in a abusive relationship, then I say, no, it’s not worth risking your life to keep that boyfriend.

And the same is true if the abuse is not physical. It’s not worth staying in a relationship where the person who says he loves you is killing your spirit. Get out of abusive relationships, whether physical, verbal, or emotional. It’s not worth it.

Extricating yourself safely from an abusive boyfriend is not easy. You need help from family, friends, and sometimes others. It takes courage and perseverance. Find a therapist with experience in helping abuse survivors, go to a women’s shelter, get a restraining order, or do whatever you need to do to get out.

Not Just for Women

Although the subject gets less attention, it’s not always a man abusing a woman. Some women abuse their boyfriends or husbands, both physically and emotionally. Same-sex couples also have their share of abusers. So whoever you are and whatever kind of relationship you have, if you are experiencing abuse, get help. Now.

Find help in your local area at this Domestic Violence Hotlines and Resources page.

National Domestic Violence Hotline
1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
1-800-787-3224 (TDD)

Just my thoughts. What do you think?